So my friend Spyder and I went on a cruise to the Bahamas last weekend for my birthday. We decided to go on a three day cruise since she had never been on one; and was not sure if she would like cruising.
I flew out of KCMO and she flew out of BWI. When Hot Carl dropped me off at the airport it was 5am and sleeting. We were ½ hour late taking off, because they had to de-ice the plane. Yes us Kansans and Missourians fly in ice and snow (take note Atlanta). I land in Memphis and check my phone. I have a panicked message from Spyder’s parents that they cannot get a hold of her and they not know if she made it out of BWI because of the wind shears and snow, and that they have shut down BWI. I assume since I have not heard from Spyder she is on the plane. I call her parents and calm them down. Get on plane #2 and head to Orlando.
On the plane an elderly couple Jay and Dee sit beside me and we start talking. They too are going on the same cruise and they are Platinum members of Royal Caribbean. We exchange cabin numbers and chat on the 1 ½ hr flight and promise to meet up on the ship. We land Spyder is there and she meets Jay and Dee and then I made sure she called her parents and calmed them down. I call Hot Carl let him know I am safe and headed to the ship. Hot Carl then informs me that 3 inches of snow has fallen and he is headed out side on his 1st day off in two weeks to shovel the snow, poor guy.
Spyder, Jay, Dee and I all head to the transfer bus that will drive us the hour to Port Canaveral and to our impending Sun and Fun. We arrive and get checked into the ship and head to our cabins. Spyder and I get to our cabin drop our luggage on the tiny twin beds and hang up our formals so the wrinkles will come out. We then head for food. We hit the buffet and eat what else? Hamburgers of course, they really only had snack foods, hamburgers, pizza and hot dogs out since it was 2pm. We then look at shops and then head back to the room, since Muster is in 15 mins. Muster is when everyone walks from the cabins to the decks of the ship in this case (every ship is different) and listens to what to do is we pull a Titanic. At this point the drunken woman next to me trips over her own feet, falls into her husband and then laughs and spills her drink on him. This is the first of many drunkards to come.
We had back to the cabin again to put on swim suits and sun bath. We sun bath about an hour before the 35 mph winds makes it too cold to stay on top of the ship. We decide to go play bingo. It is only one game and I get one number I18 away from winning when some woman screams and wins. Oh well. Patrick the Cruise Director assistant then tells us if we find him on the cruise and say, “Hey, Hey Patrick” he will give us free Bingo cards to play later. This starts my stalking of Patrick.
We head to dinner, and had ok chicken and steak for dinner. Our table mates that night are two pharmacists from Michigan on a girl’s weekend like us and a Joe Pesci wanna be from Toronto. There was not a single dessert I could eat so they brought me a plate of food that was yummy.
The next morning we docked in Nassau and went shopping because it was supposed to rain and be cold. We hit all the touristy stuff and went on the scavenger hunt with our ship port shopping book, which allows you to get free tanzanite chip ear rings, free Del Sol tote bag, free quartz ear rings, etc. We also found the Bacardi store FREE SAMPLES!!! There I found fabulous Banana Rum and bought three bottles for $1.50 each. I also bought one bottle of Coconut rum, to have it all taken away when we boarded the boat. I was promised I would get it back at the end of the trip. We went back to the ship and tried to lie out again, but it was too cold, so we took naps and then head to formal photo shoots and dinner. Now I need to explain how I pack. I get a lot of grief from the hussies on how I pack.
A friend about 5 years ago told me to pack clothes you were going to throw away because that leaves you room to bring home souvenirs. So pack t-shirts with holes in them, that you wear under other shirts, old underwear, socks, etc. So I pack a pair of pants that were a little tight for the regular dinners, a pointy madonna bra, and then the formal. This formal was more semi-horrible than anything. Apparently I was high the day I bought it. It was a brown satin broom stick skirt and a brown/teal/sequined Nero jacket. Yeah it was bad. So I wore this outfit to dinner that night and had pictures taken in it. I will post pictures later. That night dinner was a dry sea bass fillet. Also the waiters knew it was my birthday weekend and sung Happy Birthday to me in English, Spanish, Portuguese, Italian, and Chinese, and I got an extra plate of fruit.
The final day we were supposed to dock at CoCo Cay and snorkel, but there were 9 foot waves and we could not dock so we sailed around in circles and played trivia on the ship and Bingo. I had stalked Patrick all three days and kept jumping up and yelling, “Hey, Hey Patrick;” I was able to accumulate 4 Bingo cards. We lost again, but won 10 bucks on pull tabs sheets that they handed out. We shopped on the boat and read books and relaxed, played scrabble and hung out with Jay and Dee, who shared their platinum coupons with us. That evening we went to the musical review. Which will be tomorrow’s post. Dinner was a dry salmon fillet and fruit, then the head waitress who knew I was lactose intolerant and that I liked tofu had the chef whip up a special plate of sautéed tofu with carrots, onions and peppers. I had to eat it even though I was so stuffed I wanted to throw up. So after a plate of tofu, salmon and fruit, you can imagine the gas that was brewing. This is when I wished we would have sprung for a room with a window. Sorry again Spyder.
The final morning we wake up at 4am in 40 degree weather to go see the Space Shuttle launch at 4:14am and it launched behind a cloud so we saw nothing. Imagine 100 people on deck freezing looking up at the sky. A few smart ones brought their blankets and wrapped it around them. We went back down to the room packed and got ready to go home.
I got my Rum back and packed it; we got to the port, bussed to the airport and flew home in a snow storm. Even though it was cold we still had a blast.
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